Roaming Revenant

Not everything is fun and sexy and I don’t want to mention only good and positive experiences. This is a story about my (now long since ex) daddy and misuse of sexuality. It’s just one of a few situations with him that left a sour taste in my mouth.

This happened in a big city a while back. We’ve only met once before and he invited me to spend time together and have a long weekend of fun.

When I arrived he told me that he has just been inform that he’s got an STD. That meant that we coudn’t have sex together at the time. I thought that as a responsible adult he would follow doctor’s advice and abstain from sex. He was a bit of a party boy and still wanted to keep going out to a cruising club on the days I was there. There is nothing wrong with that at all – as long as he exercised self-restraint.

Turns out he didn’t. He put his own sexual gratification above the health and well-being of his partner(s). At first he would say no, but eventually no turned in to apathy and ultimately in to yes.

I was really taken aback when I saw him playing with a guy when he should not be. He just looked at me knowingly and said: “Bad daddy”. I realised that the fact that it was forbidden and wrong made it that much more exciting for him. He wanted to do what he wanted without any care about the other person at all. Sadly I didn’t speak up at the time but I do regret it now. I should have called out bad behaviour when I saw it. But I was in a somewhat vulnerable position at the time and just let it slide.

First time we met it was in a club and eventually by the end of the night he took me to another cruising club. We were both pretty wasted at that point but he said something to me that should have been a red flag right away. He explicitly fetishised and fantasised about all the diseases that were being spread there according to him and how everyone would be infected buy the end of the night. He got off on this idea. That place did get busy on the weekend, so I just took it literally: that yes technically it’s likely that something would be passed, but I was drunk and the full meaning didn’t register with me until months later.

Of course having a more adventurous sexual life does come with increased risks but knowingly spreading diseases when you have been told to keep it in your trousers by a doctor is another matter all together. This behaviour is not only selfish but also illegal.

It is our responsibility to be honest and respect people that we meet along the way. We should treat them the way that we would want to be treated ourselves. When we are truthful and respectful, we create a positive environment around us. And that is even more important when it comes to casual sex and health.